Stressing about finances.
I remember these feelings all too well.
Being a single mother weather by choice or by circumstance has to be hands down the hardest job in the world. I became a single mother when I was just 23 years old. Scared and alone to raise my daughter, I spent my days stressing over all the things that I was doing wrong. How can I pay the rent and the day care? How do I take time for myself without feeling guilty?
As a single mom, I carried so much weight on my shoulders and a lot of times it was unnecessary.
If I could go back and talk to my single mom self, these are the things I would want me to know.
YOUR BEST IS GOOD ENOUGH. It really is. There is no “normal” in this world and there is no sense in comparing yourself to others. Even if you ate McDonalds every night and never got around to laundry and you lost your patience in the car rider line…it’s all ok. You are trying your very best and that is all anyone could ever ask of you.
YOU ARE NOT ALONE. You may not have a significant other to help you, but that doesn’t mean you have to be on your own. Lean on your friends and family. Find support groups. Supportive Coworkers. Seek out help. It doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human. You need someone to share life with. A shoulder to cry on.
MAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF. As hard as it is and as guilty as you feel that time to refresh is good for your soul. It only makes you a better mom when you can have that time to refocus and refill your cup.
At the end of the day it comes down to this….Nobody has a perfect childhood because there is no such thing as a perfect parent. We are all just a bunch of imperfect parents trying to do right by our children and there is no right or wrong way to do it.
Give yourself some grace. Allow yourself to breathe. You are going to be ok.
YOU ARE GOING TO BE OK.