My name is Michelle Tanner.
I am 33 years old.
I am a wife, mother, sister, friend.
And I am overweight.
And saying that seems to make a lot of people uncomfortable and I have no idea why.
Whenever I say something regarding my weight I am always met with quick responses of “Stop”, “No you’re not”, “Don’t say that”.
But I am, and it’s ok. Maybe I won’t be that way forever, and maybe I will be. Regardless, it’s a part of who I am right now, and that is ok.
Last week I had the opportunity to join some friends for a beauty event hosted for bloggers in our area. I always get nervous about events like that because I have learned all too well over the years how they will play out. At the event I had a great time with friends. I tried on makeup and drank champagne. But what I noticed that I know my friends didn’t, was that I was the largest woman there. And while we made the rounds talking with different makeup artists and hosts and bloggers, most pretended I wasn’t there. They never met my gaze or made eye contact when explaining their brand. They chose to engage with my friends over me.When the photographer was getting shots of our group I could physically see her positioning the camera to crop me out or find a way to shoot around me. And when we saw the pictures the next day,I was right.
At this point, it doesn’t even hurt my feelings. It’s happened more than I can even count.
These days, it just gets me thinking….
Since when did overweight = outcast? Or even more, why do people associate being overweight with being ugly?
Why is it ok for a 125 lb. woman to eat a cupcake or over indulge in some Mexican food and talk about how she is so “fat”, but an overweight woman like myself makes a comment about my weight and I am silenced and told not to talk about it?
It makes no sense to me.
I think by not allowing me or anyone else for that matter to have a conversation about it, it is just saying that it isn’t ok. That we can’t be ourselves.
The crazy thing is that I am more than just my size. I am more than just a number on the scale.
I am smart, I am funny, I am creative, I am talented.
I am a great friend, and wife and mother.
I AM BEAUTIFUL.
I. AM. MORE.
Lauren Watson says
UGH why are people so dumb!!! Girl, you are TOTALLY more! You’re an AMAZING friend & our size has nothing to do with who we are! It sucks that people are suckish sometimes but you have an amazing attitude! Don’t let anyone get you down…and next time get in the middle of the pics & tell them to have fun trying to crop you out & to suck it! 😉
Michelle I love this post. Thank you for being so honest and open about your weight. You are definitely SO MUCH MORE than a number on the scale and I happen to think you are a beautiful person both inside and out. It breaks my heart that the photographer would intentionally crop you out of photos at an event, it just goes to show that we have a LONG way to go with this topic. Although I can not relate to your struggle as someone who’s been an average size my entire life, I have a lot of overweight family members who have openly shared similar stories and it just breaks my heart. I think as long as you’re comfortable in your own skin that’s all that matters.
Anyway I didn’t mean for this to get long winded but thank you for starting a conversation that definitely needs to be started! XO
Meg O. says
I must be completely oblivious (or maybe insensitive?) to these things because I didn’t know this was going on at the event. You are my friend who I love and care about and never do I think about your figure. You ARE more than that.